“Good morning, I am your worst nightmare come true: a fabulously wealthy pornographer with the courage and willingness to spend his last dime to expose how you are perverting the Constitution of this great land. Now let’s get down to business.“
“Larry Flynt for President” campaign ad, Nov. 1963

“If elected, my primary goal will be to eliminate sexual ignorance and venereal disease. Every ounce of strength I can muster, both physically and psychologically, will be used courageously and endlessly to remove the massive repressive hand of government, the ruling class, from the crotch of the American people.“
–Larry Flynt, presidential candidacy announcement, Oct 16, 1983

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With the amount of news that Larry Flynt and Joe Francis are getting for their request of a $5 billion federal bailout on behalf of the adult entertainment industry, you’d think that they would start a reality show: “Mr. Porn Goes To Washington”. I’d call it “Mr. Flynt Goes To Washington”, but that’s been done already. And I have no comment on Mr. Francis, who I am unfortunately going to have to pin the tail-gating on media donkey (no jokes about Tijuana, please) in his attempt to get some airtime on TMZ. By the way, TMZ: please don’t refer to Francis as a “porn king”. Francis isn’t even on the same planet as Flynt. Kthxbai.

Anyone that thinks that this is a legitimate plea for federal funding has to check their meds. Seriously. Flynt’s got a great sense of humor and has always had a giant set of brass balls that help him regularly poke fun at the federal government. OK, well maybe “poke fun at” is putting it mildly. Remember the Jackie O. pics? “Nailin’ Palin”? The Falwell Campari ad? (well, that’s not political….wait, maybe it is.) Trust me, this man loves dethroning political dynasties – and yes, he IS that awesome.

I’m sure that all of the legal issues surrounding Mr. Flynt’s restraining and cease-and-desist orders against his nephews for launching an adult company named FLYNT had put him in a courthouse mood – and with “Stimulus” this and “Package” that, I’m sure that he knows a prime opportunity to laugh in the face of Washington when he sees it.

Remember the California Governor recall election? Remember when we actually HAD to choose between about a thousand different candidates, including Flynt, Gary Coleman and Mary Carey? I’m surprised that MORE people aren’t asking for bailout funds.

This should be fun to sit back and watch. Thanks for the entertainment, Larry – you know when to bring a smile to our faces when the chips are down. But you’ve always done that, haven’t you? You’ve got style, sir

I’m going to go and try to find a copy of Joan Brooker-Marks’ documentary Larry Flynt: The Right to be Left Alone. Anyone know how I can get a copy? Email me at kellyshibari@gmail.com …

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